Meet The Crew
They’re gruesome. Nobody’s arguing that point.
But once you get to know them… well, ok; they’re still hideous but at least you know why. And it’s not like they care what you think of them — they’ve survived much worse than a negative opinion. Trust us, it doesn’t get much worse than what these luckless undead have endured. Think your day was bad? Just check out the backstories on these members of our monster community.
The Zombie Crew
Butcher Billy — Guess what cooking tips Billy is into? Hacks. Always killing it in the kitchen, Billy wasn’t always a butcher. He happily served customers until one inappropriately demanded seconds, straight from Billy’s left hand. Now, when Billy rings the dinner bell, it’s BONE appetit!
Cheerleader Chelsea — Such beauty, such poise, such a disgrace. Chelsea was once head cheerleader for the local high school. But that one horrific night, where the loss on the field meant a loss of heads, Chelsea’s pom poms have never recovered and her splits? Let’s just say she leaves a little too much of herself on the sidelines.
Creeping Kenneth — Before the zombie apocalypse, Kenneth was everyone’s friend. You knew a party was going to be a good time if Kenneth was there. Now, after lending more than a hand to a group of ghouls one Saturday night, Kenneth makes a ghoul out of himself, creeping around town looking for a few new fiends to liven up his dead party.
Decomposing Daniel — Kenneth’s younger brother Daniel has always been more than a little jealous of his popular sibling. So that night, when he set up the band of marauding walkers to lure Kenneth into aiding them by the side of the highway, he found that the arrangement would cost him an arm, a leg, and more than a pound of flesh. Poor Daniel, he’s still following Creeping Kenneth around town waiting for scraps.
Eye-popping Paige — Wow, what a looker. Or is that a walker? Once the manager of Fredonia’s most popular casino, Paige was the envy of most women and the desire of most men. All it took was for her to put a little skin in the game, and she became just another victim of the outbreak. Now she’s turning heads in a whole new way — and it’s not pretty.
Gnawin’ Nikki — It’s just ironic. Before the outbreak, Nikki had this really annoying habit of chewing gum. Actually, chewing is putting it mildly. The girl chomped endlessly, loudly, and oddly aggressively, as if she had a bone to pick with each wad. Call it karma, social justice, or sad irony that she herself is covered in bite marks now and what she masticates on can hardly be said to freshen the breath. Taste the brainbow.
Gutsy Garrett — Garrett has always taken his service to his country extremely seriously. Too seriously some would say. When he volunteered to fight the undead, he lost both his guts and his glory. Now he’s trying to be all that he can zombie.
Jailbreaker Jake — One may want to ask what makes Jake such a slippery character, but trust us, you don’t want to know. Once infected, the repeat criminal discovered a fairly sickening way of sliding through the bars of the jail and escaping into the night. But don’t worry, cops are hot on his entrails.
Killer Clown — All the nopes. Even before he was undead, Fredonia’s least popular clown elicited more shivers than joy. Putting on a grave face, honking his hideous red nose, and constantly roaming for another opportunity to… clown around.
Linebacker Leon — Giving “smashmouth football” an entirely too-literal meaning, Leon took his brutality on the gridiron to a whole new level once he was sidelined by a coach with a taste for blood. Suited up for gore, he’s a true monster on the field.
Lurching Lucas — Dude’s gone mental. But who can blame him? Once upon a time, Lucas was arguably the coolest guy in town. Now he’s just plain cold and it’s disturbing. He’s the guy who gave Gnawin’ Nikki her infamous nickname after a stomach-turning first date.
Mama Mae — Never one to put up with deadbeats, Mama Mae proved to be quite the challenge for the zombies. Having raised Kenneth and Daniel, she was prepared to battle monsters. Unfortunately, she wasn’t quite ready when she turned out to be the main course during dinner. However, she remains a “deadicated” parent.
Officer Owens — If you ever have the misfortune of meeting Officer Owens, you’ll know there are far worse things than a traffic ticket. Once a pillar of the community, Owens’ downfall came when he tried to stop Jailbreaker Jake from escaping custody. You could say he’s got a flesh start as a decorated member of the undead.
Quarterback Connor — From stud to dud, just like that. When you’re the star quarterback and boyfriend of the head cheerleader Chelsea, everything’s looking up. But the big game turned ugly and all his on-field strategies couldn’t save him from the onslaught. Now, he’s lucky if he qualifies for a skullership.
Rancid Santa — Look kids! Santa’s joined his own naughty list! After delivering toys last year to the children of Fredonia Santa had a mishap of sorts that … well, let’s just say Santa went for a different kind of slay-ride. Now, after stewing for a year in his own putrid juices, Santa’s back with a special treat.
Rotting Randall — You know that guy who always has some tired joke or groan-inducing pun to share? Yeah, that’s Randall. It’s no wonder somebody stabbed him in the back. It was probably just to get him to shut up. Unfortunately, the undead weren’t any happier with him than the living and the infection set in before death came to call. Now he roams the town, looking for zombody to love.
Snarling Sam — Who’s a good boy? Not Sam. Well, not anymore anyway. Living, Sam was the loyal companion to Garrett, serving by his side without fail. He protected his owner throughout the onslaught of walking dead, only to become one himself. Rest in pieces, boy.
Straggly Stewart — Too bad for the Karens of the world; when they demand to see the manager, it’s Stewart that they have to deal with. And he’s no deadweight. Though he is focused on customer service, there’s nothing he enjoys more than taking a bite out of an overly aggressive soccer mom.
Stumblin’ Sterling — Even after apocalypse, Sterling’s commitment to keeping unruly kids off his lawn has never wavered. Though we can’t say the same about him. His decaying form is getting the job done though. We don’t remember the last time we saw a kid on his property. Oh… ewww.
Swat Johnson — To be fair, we’re sure he wasn’t exactly meaning to taunt the walkers when he said they’d take over the town over his dead body. He was just trying to do his job as commander of the local SWAT team. Unfortunately, his partner didn’t have his back, so the undead did.
Tombstone Travis — We’re not gonna lie. Travis used to be quite the ladies man. That is until Paige sank her teeth into him. Literally. Once the hottest couple in town, the two split (in more ways than one) after becoming infected. One could say that their relationship ran its corpse.
Toxic Tony — Living in an RV outside of town, Tony thought that maybe his hermit-like seclusion finally paid off when townies started dropping like flies from the zombie apocalypse. But never being able to resist a cookie, Tony opened his door to the wrong Girl Scout (or is it Ghoul Scout) — who made a treat out of Tony, transforming him into another of the undead.